I really should be revising for a mock test on Monday, but I decided to take a half hour break to get out some of my emotions.
On reflection, this has been one of the worst and most destructive weeks I have had so far. At times, it has felt as if I am being thrown obstacles from literally every direction, and I am ashamed to say that they have derailed me in some ways.
As of yet, I am feeling no better regarding the boyfriend situation, even though I know that if I was in a better place, a lot of this may not have occurred. On the contrary, it did, and I cannot dwell on the idea that I can turn back time, because I cannot.
I think recently I have simply been feeling numb, as if my life is on repeat. Everything I do within a day turns out to be such a battle, from getting dressed to being forced through a meal. This numbness clouds very waking hour, it also finds a way to seep into my precious few hours of sleep, ensuring that I am exhausted constantly. I no longer know what to do with myself, I cannot concentrate on studying, I feel I have no real place in the blog world, social situations are difficult. I am well and truly lost.