Rejection and reflection

Yesterday, I wrote a long post about how awful my Sunday was, and how it happened every Sunday, how I always ruined my mums weekend, how I hated myself for it. But instead of posting it, I decided to try to change things. Okay, so I ruined the weekend, this doesn’t mean I have to ruin the week. Okay, I haven’t gotten to the bottom of the problem, but I can try to change regardless.

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My team

So today, when my friends invited me to withdraw money for our holiday at break time, I said yes. Because I wanted to have a laugh with them, even if it was freezing cold.

Then later on, I tried recording a conversation between ED and I, on paper, so I could see it in black and white. I am proud to say it went okay, I still need to work on it, but making my recovery choices and anorexia choices chart has helped, and provided me with more ammunition.

Sadly, tonight I had my first rejection from a University. I am sad, scared and anxious about what this means. I worry that I will not get a place at university, and recovery will be for nothing. I need to stop defining myself by my academic achievements, but sadly, I seem to have nothing else to define myself by at the moment.

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This was actually in summer, but I still feel like I have to keep picking myself up from a low point

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1 Comment

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One response to “Rejection and reflection

  1. You will wind up where you need to be…just as you turned Sunday around for good, so does God work to weave all things together in a beautiful tapestry.. for those who believe.
    You are exactky where you need to be because you are doing right. That’s all that matters.

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